I Heart Iyanla

I have so many Iyanla quotes that she deserves her own page. Keep checking back as I will continue to add to this as I read more.


Forgiveness

Forgiveness eliminates the negative thoughts and emotions which create negative effects in your life. When you learn to forgive, you no longer have reasons to be angry. You see. You hear. You intuit. You forgive. You move on. It is really quite simple.

Through forgiveness, we create new realities that allow us to experience greater love and freedom. Forgiveness sets the stage for a new act in our lives to begin. Holding on to judgments about experiences and people keeps us in limitation.

You might be asking yourself, "Why would I want to practice forgiveness?" The answer is simple. Practice develops skill. Skill leads to mastery. When you master the practice of forgiveness it becomes as natural as breathing.



It can be challenging to forgive someone. The hardest person to forgive may be you. It is cruel and unnecessary to punish yourself for being human. As human beings, our growth, learning and healing are always at stake. Forgiveness fosters all three.
  
Forgiveness is a process of giving up the old for something new. Old experiences and memories that we hold on to in anger, resentment, shame, or guilt cloud our spirit mind. The truth is, everything that has happened had to happen. It was a growth experience. There was something you needed to know or learn. If you stay angry, hurt, afraid, ashamed, or guilty, you miss the lesson. You will be stuck in a cloud of pain. 

We must forgive others for what they have done and what we think they have done to us. We must also forgive ourselves for the things we have done to ourselves and others. If we do not forgive, the barnacles of the past hang onto our minds and hearts.

Forgiveness addresses how we think and feel about others and ourselves, and how those thoughts manifest within our lives as energy

Forgiveness means letting go and knowing that-regardless of how challenging, frightening, or difficult an experience may seem-everything is just as it needs to be in order for you to grow and learn.

Forgiveness is a major step toward spiritual growth and development. It must come from the heart, not the head or the mouth. When we forgive, we learn. When we learn, we grow - mentally, physically, and spiritually.

To forgive someone you believe has hurt, harmed, or violated you is no easy feat. However, doing so is a spiritual mandate for your healing, learning, and growth.


Forgive yourself for all of the unkind, unloving, unsupportive things you have thought about yourself. Forgive yourself for the things you have done to yourself, that support the things you believe about yourself that are not true. Forgive yourself for being so hard on yourself. 

Forgiveness only works when it is offered with compassion. Have compassion for yourself for feeling wounded. Have compassion because you have been unable to let go. Compassion is the ability to feel sorrow, coupled with the deep desire to alleviate pain. When your desire to feel better is greater than your anger, you will have opened the door to compassionate forgiveness. 

Judgment is the process whereby we label and categorize situations and people based on what they appear to be, without full knowledge of what they are. Judgment prohibits true understanding. Move away from judgment and towards forgiveness. 

The things we hold against ourselves rest heavy on our hearts and eat away at our sense of worth. Forgive yourself for everything you have thought, said or done that you may have told yourself could not be forgiven. With an open and willing heart, you can be freed from the prison of self-damnation.
Negativity
Why do we hold onto negativity? For some reason, we believe that others are affected by our experience of remaining upset, hurt or angry. Holding on to pain, anger, guilt or shame is the glue that binds us to the situation we want to escape.

If what you are thinking doesn't make you feel good, change that thought. Remind yourself that bad cannot bother you unless you are available.

Sometimes we make life very difficult for ourselves. We have a great ability to create our own stress. We may refuse to see the good in anything or anyone. We sometimes forget to count our blessings and complain about lack. If we choose to struggle with the issues of life, they will be very willing to fight us.

Truth is a spiritual principle that, if practiced consciously and embraced wholeheartedly, will eliminate the dark, negative thoughts that we, as physical beings, are prone to have.

The moment we have a negative experience we get stuck in what was done and how it was done to us. We must learn not to take life so personally. People are not really out to get us. Let us learn to give up anger and fear by replacing those things with love.


Many of us have shame, guilt, pain and anger attached to things we have done or experienced. We go to great lengths to hide what we have done or what has been done to us. You are as sick as your secrets. Until you reveal, examine, and unpack the negative emotions attached to the secrets, thoughts, feelings, and experiences, you are held captive by them.

What you give out will be returned to you. That is the law of compensation. Get rid of your bad thoughts, inferior attitudes and limited behaviors and good will be attracted to you. It's not easy. It's not magic. But it works, miraculously.

We make our days pleasant or miserable. If we insist on being miserable, irritable and nasty, more than likely the day will give us exactly what we give it. A day is too valuable to waste on misery and unhappiness

Facing Challenges
If you attack a problem, you are going to get your butt whipped. Anything you attack will fight back. Don't attack your problems. Face them, confess them, understand what they are - that is the process.

No storm can last forever. It will never rain 365 days consecutively. Trouble comes to pass, not to stay. You can trust life to give you the courage that is required to do anything or face anything. Challenge comes to make you, not break you.

There will be times when you fall flat on your face. Things that were going well will go wrong. Things that were not going so well will blow up in your face. It is a trick! Do not be fooled by appearances! Hold on to the words, the prayer, the little bits of trust and faith you can muster. You are not being tested! You are being fortified! Remember, you cannot fail!

Every experience, no matter how painful, is an opportunity to learn. At times, we learn about ourselves. In other instances, we learn about others. In the midst of the most difficult lesson, we learn the tenacity of spirit and how far it will take us.

People love to tell how life is unfair, unjust and inequitable. Here is the real story. Life is a process of sowing and reaping! A focused, consistent, positively motivated and disciplined character is essential to making your life story have a happy ending. Till your mental soil with determination. Fertilize your emotional soil with positive words. And plant the seed of your heart's desire with your disciplined efforts.
 

You must have faith that all of the things you expect from life are possible for you. You must have faith that no matter what life brings you, you will be able to handle it. You must have faith that your faith will eventually lead to good experiences.

Self Love
Dear God, Teach me how to love myself beyond the distorted perceptions and false beliefs I have created about myself. Teach me how to love myself beyond the judgments I may have held about myself and against myself. I open my mind and heart to receive Your love and loving guidance now.

It is our concern over what others say, do and think about us that imprisons our mind, body and spirit. What other people think about me is not my concern.

Are you one of those people who is always there when somebody needs you? Everybody calls on you. Everybody needs you. You are, after all, strong enough, smart enough, tough enough to make it through anything and everything. Well, who do the strong go to? The strong have needs. The strong have weaknesses! Take the time for you to do the same things for yourself as you do for others.

When we find ourselves in a conflict or confrontation we must know how to love ourselves out of it. Love means opening our hearts and minds to our best, regardless of what is going on. Love means not attacking but supporting, not defending but seeking clarity. Love means knowing that, in the end, we will all be okay even if it means we have to give up a little of something.

Comparison of yourself to anybody is an act of violence to yourself.
 
Surrender & Acceptance
When a thing has served its purpose, it will go away. If you try to hold on to something that has already fulfilled its purpose in your life, you are going to hurt yourself. If holding on is disturbing your peace of mind, it makes sense to let go. Surrender all attachments to people and things that you have been struggling to hold on to.

You are exactly where you are because all that you have to give and receive is right where you are now. Where you are is valuable and important. Everything you know is needed right where you are. Everything you can do is do-able right where you are. Who you are, where you are, what you know give you value.

Is there a persistent problem plaguing you? Does it seem to just loom over your head waiting to swoop down and devour you? Good! That is exactly where you need to be! Now take your mind off the problem and laugh. That's right, laugh. Stare adversity in the face and affirm, "I know there is a power for good in the universe and I call that power forth right now to perfect every condition in my life."

On the road to successful living and learning, we must realize, we are always exactly where we are supposed to be. Do what you can do. Do it to the best of your ability. Never doubt that what you are doing is right for you at the time you are doing it. Do not judge yourself. Always look for the blessing in every experience, even if the blessing falls on someone else.

Everything you have done and been through is valuable and important. In order to be who you are, to know what you know, to be where you are in this moment, you needed to go through what you went through.

Everything happens when it needs to happen; everyone is always where they need to be. You will never miss out on what is meant for you, even if it has to come to you in a roundabout way.

You must have faith that all of the things you expect from life are possible for you. You must have faith that no matter what life brings you, you will be able to handle it. You must have faith that your faith will eventually lead to good experiences.

Your heart has answers that you cannot get from anywhere else. Only your heart knows what is right for you, what is good for you, and what is best for you. Ask in your own heart about those things for which there seem to be no answer.

Choices and Change


We are living in a new age, a new time, when things must be different. You cannot continue to do what has always been done. Something or someone must change. It might as well be you! You have the visions. You have the opportunity. The only thing you need is the strength and courage to recognize that you have been chosen for the awesome task of implementing change.

What are you waiting for? With all you say you want there is a dream for you to follow, a goal for you to set, a plan for you to make, a possibility for you to explore, an opportunity for you to grab, and a choice for you to make.

At every single moment, we are given the opportunity to choose our future. What we do today will determine what we face next week, next month, or next year. It is at the moment of a particular occurrence that we are called upon to make a choice: Will I do it the way I've always done it, or will I do it a different way. 


Profound inner peace does not come from fixing yourself. It is the result of making lasting changes at the core of the being. It is the result of discovering that you are already whole.

Feelings


Being hurt is a sign that there is something in you that requires your attention. Being hurt is a sign that you have been engaging in a pattern of behavior that no longer serves who you are.

When someone does you harm, it seems only natural that you should do the same to them, right? Wrong! You can never get even with someone who has harmed you. Any attempt to do so puts you behind the eight ball, again. Two wrongs never make a right.
Feel what you feel and allow it to pass. Don't judge your feelings or yourself for having them. Do not label your feelings good or bad, right or wrong. Drop your hands to your sides and give yourself permission to ride out the emotional tidal waves that are sure to surface every now and then. Each time an emotion surfaces, this is a sure sign that you are working through it in order to release it.


Your heart has answers that you cannot get from anywhere else. Only your heart knows what is right for you, what is good for you, and what is best for you. Ask in your own heart about those things for which there seem to be no answer.

Love & Grace


Love is the only experience that replaces fear. Peace is the result. Love is the experience of taking in the breath of life, without fear. When you know that you can handle all things in love, peace is the result.

Inhale. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale. What a wonderful gift of life. Inhale. Exhale. The beginning and the end. Inhale peace, exhale confusion. Inhale faith, exhale worry. Inhale love, exhale anger. Breath is the gift of grace. As long as we have it, we have the divine opportunity to go it again.

No matter what they have done to you and said to you, you cannot stop loving them. No matter how much they disappoint you, if you think you love them, you probably do. Do not tell yourself you don't love somebody if you do. What you might want to do is make a choice about whether you want this person to be a part of your life. You can love them in the deepest part of your being and choose to move on.

You don't have to meet certain qualifications to be loved. You do not have to do anything special, in a certain way, to get love. The only thing that is ever required of you is to be who you are and feel good about it.

Parenting


The best thing you can do for your children is to share with them what you know, and let them make their own choices based on what you have shared. When they falter or fall, be there for them without anger or fear. Take the conditions off of your love.

It is hard for our children to tell us what they really feel. They don't want to hurt us. They don't want to be disrespectful. They may not believe what they think and feel if valuable. As parents, it is sometimes hard for us to let them be who they really are - people, with thoughts, feelings and dreams. We must consider whether the things we want for them are the things they want for themselves.

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